Butler Will _ what  cheek! 

Hi, my names Will. Although you need to be very fit, sociable  and good looking for this work, You quickly learn to be very open minded too. Take last week for instance : I had a very strange party assignment to do in Battersea. I was told it was a ladies coffee morning. These have so far ranged from Baby Showers and Birthdays where everyone is swapping gifts to Divorce Parties where they are either spray painting or playing tug of war with their ex husband’s suits (till they rip them to shreds).

When I arrived at this one though there initially seemed to have been a vow of silence taken by the 8 participants (I was afraid maybe it would turn out to be a wake for somebody’s recently departed grandmother.) I was shown a room where I could change, then I made all the ladies fresh coffee and handed it around on a silver tray- They looked me up and down discretely and smiled approvingly and sipped their coffees quietly. Then there was a bit of whispering and giggling that I couldn’t quite make out or really understand.

Then the hostess asked if I could iron by any chance . Somewhat puzzled I answered “Yes certainly  madam – is there something special you need ironing?”  “Oh yes please!” she replied and   proceeded to point me at the most enormous pile of ironing I’ve ever seen! The strangest part of all was that I ironed for nearly the whole two hours I was there, facing the corner of the room. The ladies chatted happily away whilst I ironed and apart from the odd bright flash of light now and again (which was rather like a camera flash) , the morning passed very calmly indeed.

After I finished all the ironing, all the other ladies in the group wanted to book me for their ironing coffee mornings too. I’m really not too sure to this day , whether they wanted me for my ironing skills or my cute cheeks!