"I was at a big corporate ladies dinner night in London with about 5 other butlers on the lead up to Christmas. We were mainly serving the wine to the ladies at the table whilst the normal everyday waiters served the dinner. I had noticed every time I went past this lady on the end of a long table that she stopped me for more wine and a bit of a chat. They had just got to the after dinner speeches so everyone was looking towards the speaker. I was standing near her table with the wine bottle in my hands ready to top people up, when suddenly I felt something cold and smooth pass quickly between my cheeks – I spun quickly round to see what it was and saw this lady grinning at me as she held her credit card aloft! “Are you hoping for cash back with that madam? “ I enquired with a wink.

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